Lots of Change

We have had a busy last couple of weeks in our family!  I went back to work from my maternity leave, Hattie started wearing her hearing aids and we found out that we matched at Duke University for Kevin's residency.  Phew!

I've been back to work for 2 weeks now- it's hard for me to believe.  This month Kevin has been doing research and has been able to do a lot of it from home, so he has been playing Mr. Mom :)  It has helped me a lot knowing she was with Daddy and getting some special one on one time with him.  Because I have been at work, Kevin has been dealing with her hearing aids more than me.  He has done a great job of making sure she is wearing them enough hours in the day.

Her cute, pink hearing aids

Some great news with the hearing aids, is that Hattie has responded to sound when wearing them!  So far, she has only startled if she has fallen asleep with them in.  She can primarily hear Kevin's voice because it is deeper than mine.  I know, because of this, that she is hearing when she is awake; she just hasn't started turning to the sound.  Since she is getting some sound then we know that at least one ear is functioning and that is encouraging for a future implant.  Hattie will get another hearing test at 6 months old when she is able to sit in a booth and see what sounds she is hearing.  At this time, she will get a CT scan of her ears to determine if she can get cochlear implants.  Until then we will continue with the hearing aids.

As I stated earlier, we found out a couple weeks ago that we will be headed to Durham, North Carolina this summer for the next 3 years.  Kevin will start his Internal Medicine residency at Duke.  I couldn't be more proud of all he has accomplished.  He has worked so hard during medical school and his determination and discipline has payed off!  This was our top choice, not only for Kevin's training, but because North Carolina is a top notch state in cochlear implants and speech/audiology services.  We feel so blessed that we are moving to an area that will provide Hattie with the best services during these next crucial 3 years in her development.  We had been praying all along that God would make it apparent where He wanted us for residency- He definitely did!  God is good!  I'll leave you with a cute picture of Hattie and Daddy on Match Day :)

Hearing Aids and Cochlear Implants

As I mentioned in the previous post, we met with an Audiologist last week to get impressions taken for Hattie's hearing aids.  She did a great job and slept through the whole appointment!  She will get her actual hearing aids next week.  We are looking forward to this appointment to begin her time in her hearing aids.

We have decided that we would like Hattie to be in the hearing world.  There are different opinions on what is best for a child (listening/verbal route or sign language).  I have learned, in the short time that we have been immersed in this new world, that you have to make the decision that is best for your family.  Because we do not have anyone else in our family who is deaf we want Hattie to benefit from hearing and speaking like all of us.

We are blessed to be living in a world where technology is ever changing and improving.  An option that we have for Hattie is the placement of cochlear implants. This is an internal and external device that she would wear that will actually allow her to hear and speak.  Before we get that, however, we will do a trial run with hearing aids to determine if there is, in fact, any hearing with them.

Hattie has profound hearing loss, which means that she has virtually no hearing at all.  Because of this we do not expect that she will have sufficient hearing with her aids.  However, we will still have her wear them every waking hour to stimulate any functioning part of her auditory nerve.  If appropriate, at about 6 months of age she will get a CT scan to ensure that the anatomy of her inner ear developed properly so the cochlear implant can be placed.

The FDA has approved implantation at the age of 12 months.  Right now doctors are trying to show the benefits of implanting a child earlier to help with speech and language development.  It depends on the ENT physician, but a lot of children are able to get implanted at 9-10 months old.  Children that are implanted early usually can have normal speech, but require early and intense speech and developmental therapy.  We are very hopeful that this can be the case for Hattie!  Until then we just take one day at a time and enjoy being her parents.

Some people have asked us if you can tell that she is deaf.  Right now, besides not being startled by loud noises, the answer is no.  She babbles and squeals like hearing babies and has been smiling at Mommy and Daddy more and more.  We are told her babbling will most likely stop around 9 months because she won't get "rewarded" by hearing herself.  Because of this, we try to reward her now by being very animated when she talks or smiles so she'll continue to practice.  She is so much fun and our hearts fill with love more each day!

Smiling at Daddy

Hattie Rose

On December 28, 2011 we were blessed with our beautiful daughter, Hattie Rose.  We had been praying for her long before I ever found out I was pregnant.

A few months before we got pregnant for Hattie I had suffered a miscarriage at 12 weeks.  We were devastated!  I never truly understood the impact of a miscarriage until it happened to us.  Unfortuantely, I think that is how most things are; they have to happen to us to fully appreciate the feelings that are associated with it.  Kevin and I learned what it really meant to give our sadness and worries to God.  He was the only one who could completely comfort us during our grief.

Two months after the miscarriage we were very blessed to get pregnant again.  We were very excited to find out we were having a girl, as there is a long line of boys on my husband's side.  As my sister-in-law, Megan, exclaimed, "There's hope"!  :)  Now don't get me wrong, we will be thrilled, and hope to add a boy to our famiy some day, but we were ecstatic to start our family with a little girl!

I had a very normal, healthy pregnancy and truly enjoyed being pregnant.  My delivery went smoothly (after my epidural, of course) :)  and at 10:01am we met Hattie for the first time.

Like most of you know, hospitals screen babies' hearing when they are first born.  Hattie had her first test 6 hours after she was born.  When the nurse brought her back we were informed she had failed.  The nurse assured us that this was very normal and was most likely failed because of fluid from delivery that had not dried up yet.  They were going to test her again in 24 hours.  So, the next night the nurse took her to have the test repeated.  Once again, when they returned, we were told that she failed.  The nurse said again, probably still fluid.  The next step was to wait a couple weeks and have another hearing test done at an audiologist's office using better equipment.

At exactly 2 weeks old we had the test done.  The way they test newborns is by placing electrodes around their head to evaluate the brain's response to different sounds and pitches.  Normal conversation is heard at 0-25 decibels.  They started testing her at 50dB.  She did not respond.  The Audiologist proceeded to increase the sound by 10dB until she reached 90dB, which is where their equipment stopped.  Hattie's right ear never responded and her left ear finally responded at 90dB.  That day she was diagnosed with profound hearing loss.  Needless to say, we were stunned!  We do not have a history of congenital hearing loss in our family and, as I stated before, I had a very healthy pregnancy.

Being deaf is not a prison sentence, but has been very devastating to us.  When you dream of your future children and family, rarely do you think of anything other than everyone being healthy.  I have learned that it is important to allow yourself to grieve, even the dirty feelings that come with this.  I am not going to pretend that I am someone who does not ask God "why" during certain times.  He is a big God and I believe that He can handle our questions.  The grieving process is exactly that, a process and it comes and goes.  These past 2 1/2 months have been difficult.  I did not expect to spend my maternity leave going to different doctor's appointments and therapies every week.  However, this is our reality now and we wouldn't change it for anything.  We do not know or always understand God's plan, but we know that we are to trust Him because He is sovereign and knows what is best for us.  We are blessed that we were given the privilege of being Hattie's parents and entrusted with her care.  We will do anything we can to ensure she is getting the best possible care!  A verse that has encouraged me through the miscarriage and now this, is from Romans 15:13, "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

There is hope in all of this!  Promising treatment is available for Hattie.  I will explain all of that in my next post.  Today we have an appointment with the Audiologist to get ear molds made for Hattie's hearing aid trial run.  We continue to pray for healing and that God will reveal to us His purpose in this.  We are so blessed by the love and encouragement given to us by our family and friends.  Thank you all!